“The Power of Abstinence in Singleness”

By Alisia — Founder of The Ekklesia Women | Certified Christian Relationship Coach

“What does it really mean to honor God with your body in a world that normalizes compromise?”

As a single Christian mother beginning my journey with the Lord, I quickly realized that life in the Kingdom of God is different. There are Kingdom principles that our Heavenly Father has set in place to guide us, protect us, and transform us.

His Word reminds us that we were created in His image (Genesis 1:27). Because of this, every step of surrender to Him is part of the process of becoming more like Christ,

“For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them” (Ephesians 2:10).

Sis, I always told you—I was a radical sinner. But when God saved me, I made a decision to be just as radical for Him hahaha. I don’t believe in hypocrisy or “playing church.” My passion for the world shifted into a passion for Christ, and His Word became my foundation. Scripture says,

“His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life” (2 Peter 1:3). Every command God gives us is not to rob us of joy, but to protect us from the schemes of the enemy and keep us in His perfect will.

The Struggle of Singleness and the Call to Abstinence

Let’s be honest: singleness is not easy. Surrender is not easy. And abstinence surely is not easy. But thank God, Jesus is always there to strengthen us and to catch us when we fall.

As I walked with the Lord in my singleness, He reminded me of this truth:

“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies” (1 Corinthians 6:19–20).

Sis, this means our bodies are not our own. They belong to God. And when we abstain, we are not just saying “no” to sin—we are saying “yes” to God. Abstinence is more than self-denial; it is an act of worship. It declares to God: “Lord, I value Your will above my own desires.”

The Blessings of Abstinence

When my husband and I chose abstinence in our

single season, it became the foundation of our marriage. By removing physical intimacy from the equation, we built something deeper—emotional and spiritual intimacy rooted in Christ. We learned to communicate with honesty, to pray together, and to seek God’s will as one.

Abstinence also produced self-control, one of the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22–23). This discipline not only strengthened our faith but also prepared us for marriage. Waiting taught us patience, respect, and alignment with God’s timing. And sis, whenever we align with God, His blessings always follow.

Reflection Questions

1. In what ways have you struggled with honoring God with your body in your season of singleness?

2. How does remembering that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit change the way you view abstinence?

3. What spiritual disciplines (prayer, fasting, accountability, study of the Word) can help you grow in self-control?

4. If you are praying for a future marriage, what foundation do you want to lay during your single season?

   
   

Prayer

Heavenly Father,

I thank you for reminding me that I am your daughter, created in your image, bought with the precious blood of Jesus Christ. Lord, help me to honor You with my body, my mind, and my spirit. Strengthen me in moments of weakness, and surround me with Your grace when the journey feels hard. Teach me self-control through Your Holy Spirit, and let my singleness be a season of growth, intimacy with You, and preparation for the future You have planned. I choose to surrender my desires to Your will and walk in purity, knowing that abstinence is not just a sacrifice, but an offering of worship unto You.

In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Sis, if this word blessed you, don’t keep it to yourself—share it with another daughter of God who may be struggling in her singleness. Leave a comment below and let me know how you’re choosing to honor God with your body in this season. And if you haven’t already, I invite you to join The Ekklesia Women community—where

women of God are growing, healing, and walking boldly in purity and purpose together.

Don’t walk through this season alone—book your 1-on-1 Christian relationship coaching session with me today and let’s break cycles, build purpose, and walk in purity together.”