“Misunderstood but Still Seen by God!”

By Alisia — Founder of The Ekklesia Women | Certified Christian Relationship Coach

Have you ever been misunderstood? People misjudged your motives even though your heart was pure? Are you the one who always feels the need to explain yourself, just so others can know who you really are? And even though you took the time out to explain yourself, for them to get a clear understanding, they still misjudged you.

Sis, you’re not alone—this has been the story of my life haha!

Have you ever been the new person at church, at school, or at a job? And before you even have a chance to form your own relationships, there is this one individual who rushes to “fill you in” on who’s who—telling you who’s nice, who to avoid, and who to watch out for?

I’ve learned the hard way: often the very person “warning” you is the one you need to stay away from.

Years ago, I was in that exact situation.

With no family or friends around, I was vulnerable, eager to connect, and I was open to making new friends. One woman seemed so welcoming, and I thought her interest was genuine. My motives were pure. I didn’t yet understand that just because my heart was sincere didn’t mean hers was.

When she discovered that I was just a simple girl without much to offer by the world’s standards, I no longer “fit” her criteria for friendship. I was left hurt and embarrassed because I had opened my heart too soon.

And it didn’t stop there.

She started influencing how others saw me, telling my story in her way, and shaping people’s opinions before they even met me.

No weapon formed against you shall prosper, and every tongue which rises against you in judgment you shall condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord.” (Isaiah 54:17, NKJV)

That truth gave me peace. People may rise up, opinions may be formed, and tongues may speak, but at the end of the day, God’s voice has the final say.

One thing I’ve learned is this: when you are in a new environment, whether it’s a church, a workplace, or a new community, do not rush to open your heart to just anyone. Be wise.

The Bible says:

“Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God.” (1 John 4:1, NIV)

Not everyone who appears friendly has a heart aligned with God’s Spirit. Some people are sent as distractions, others as traps, but some are truly divine connections. That’s why discernment is so important.

Jesus Himself said:“Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves; therefore be wise as serpents and harmless as doves.” (Matthew 10:16, NKJV)

So, sis—before you allow someone into your inner circle, take it to prayer. Observe their fruit.

As Matthew 7:16 says: “You will know them by their fruits.”

God will always reveal the truth if you ask Him. Don’t ignore the red flags, but also don’t allow someone else’s experiences to rob you of your own divine relationships.

Even family members can misjudge you this way—believing what they hear about you through other family members, rather than taking the time out to know you for themselves. They sometimes feel highly about themselves and thinking they’re better than you. . But the Bible reminds us:

“If anyone says, ‘I love God,’ and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.” (1 John 4:20, ESV)

Over time, I realized something powerful: rejection was God’s protection.

He heard conversations I never heard, He saw motives I couldn’t see, and because my heart was innocent, He shielded me. What I thought was a loss was actually God’s redirection.

Proverbs 14:15 says, “The simple believe anything, but the prudent give thought to their steps.” (NIV).

That taught me a valuable truth

you can’t judge someone based on another person’s experience. Get to know others for yourselves, Another person’s experience might not be your experience. What if the very person telling you to stay away is keeping you from a divine connection God intended for your life?

What I’ve Learned:

• People may question your motives because they choose to believe others instead of getting to know you.

• The way people see you has very little to do with you—it’s more about them.

• When your heart and actions are pure, you can rest in knowing that God sees and knows the truth.

• God’s protection sometimes looks like rejection.

• Not everyone in new environments is sent by God—test the spirit, observe the fruit, and seek God’s wisdom before opening your heart.

  
  

Reflection Questions:

1. Have you ever been misjudged or misunderstood by others? How did it affect your heart?

2. Are there people in your life you’ve formed opinions about based on someone else’s words rather than your own experience?

3. How can you rest today in the confidence that God knows your heart, even when others don’t?

Prayer:

Father, I thank You that You see beyond what others say and beyond appearances. You know my heart, my motives, and my intentions. Forgive me for the times I’ve believed the wrong voices or judged others without knowing them myself. Lord, help me to walk in wisdom and discernment. Protect me from relationships that are not from You, and align me with the right people who will sharpen and encourage my faith. I release every misunderstanding, every false label, and every rejection into Your hands. Thank You that when man rejects me, You accept me. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Sis, you don’t have to carry this alone. Healing and clarity are possible through the Word of God and wise counsel.

Book your 1-on-1 Christian Relationship Coaching Session with me today, and let’s break cycles of rejection and step boldly into who God has called you to be.